So where have you been?

More than a month.  I am so sorry.  It’s kind of a long story.  I think about blogging every day, many times, and just like so many other really valuable and truly good things in my life, it’s just too hard and more than I can handle. 

My days have been full.  Of lots of medicines.

These three in particular have taken a huge toll on my cognitive function, my ability to concentrate… and all three require additional other drugs to control their side effects.  Chemo brain is real, for sure. 

Three blue ones, one big white one, five little white ones.  Yuck.  Almost as yucky as this:

That is my boot, for my broken foot.  Six weeks out, and there is no evidence of any new bone growth.  See those pills up there?  Chemotherapy works because cancers are usually made out of fast growing new little baby cells, and the drugs are engineered to kill fast growing new little baby cells.  Guess what heals fractures?  Fast growing new little baby cells. 

So much of my day is spent dealing with my drugs, and their side effects, and trying to stay off my broken foot… trying to save up strength to really be present for my children when they need me… still teaching my Sunday School class, with lots and lots of help 🙂 …  but every once in a while I manage to pull myself together to do something interesting.

This picture was taken at the Allegro Foundation Ambassador’s Ball.  The Allegro Foundation provides movement education classes for children with disabilities.  Danny, who started their classes in the fall, was chosen to be one of the dancers to perform at this REALLY fancy black tie fundraising event.  And they asked me to talk.  In front of all these seriously important people.  Who paid thousands of dollars just to sit and have dinner.  And who then gave way more thousands (adding up to about a zillion) in contributions. 

Danny and I both have so many stories to tell from that night.  I got brave and went to buy mastectomy prostheses to wear with my ballgown.  And had resulting technical difficulties.  That deserves its own post for sure 🙂  .  There was a whole contingent of big deal people from Washington DC, and I was so proud of Danny when he introduced himself to the ambassador to the US from Turkey (photo above) and all the other dignitaries.  So I gave my speech, and then afterwards had to talk to a whole line of people…. and for more than halfway through, this lady was standing next to me with her arm around me… I don’t have personal space issues, but it seemed rather odd.  Turns out it was Sue Myrick.  She wanted to tell me her breast cancer story. 

Then much to my surprise, Esther emailed me this morning, with a link to ME giving my speech.  A video on the Allegro Foundation website.  It was very awkward to watch myself  – crazy just regrown hair, fat face from steroids… needing the MC to haul me up the steps to the podium because it is quite difficult to walk in one fancy shoe, one boot and a floor length gown… but I watched it anyway.  Then I made the fatal mistake of emailing the link to my parents. 

The video is fourteen minutes.  They called me after fourteen minutes and two seconds and my dad asked me to please, please put it on my blog.  He never asks me for anything, so no matter how awkward and anxiety provoking it is to think about a video of ME talking about one of MY children, I figured I should do my best.

So here it is.  My speech from the 2012 Ambassador’s Ball.  I can’t embed it directly, but if you go to the Allegro Foundation website and click the link under the photo, there I am. 

http://www.allegrofoundation.net/event/amb2012.html 

Thanks for listening.  I’ve missed you.

33 thoughts on “So where have you been?

  1. Dear Elizabeth,

    It is so good to see you! And, you look just beautiful in your sparkly dress. I even like your hair, seriously. 🙂 I haven’t watched the video yet (it’s too loud here right now and I just can’t hear it!), but I plan to soon.

    I pray for you every day.

    God bless you,
    Michele F.

  2. Elizabeth: I watched the entire video (and I hardly ever watch video links) and was moved to tears. Bless you and your family. And bless you for being a mama who heals her baby’s broken heart. I’m so happy for Danny!
    Michele (who met you at Sock Summit 2009; you gave me yarn and I gave you Sox Stix)

  3. By the way, you neglected to mention that BEATING ME MERCILESSLY AT GAME AFTER GAME OF WORDFEUD also takes up a good chunk of your day. 🙂 Also by the way, I can name people who would PAY MONEY for cute spiked hair like you have. (Back to working on financial aid forms IN MY CAR) during kids’ choir.

  4. Elizabeth, It’s so good to hear from you again. I check every day to see if you’ve had the energy to talk to us. I cried through almost the entire video; I was warned ahead of time to have Kleenex ready. I know how important your children’s hearts are to you and the lengths you go to make sure their hearts are healthy. You spoke about that eloquently.

    Love and prayers, Nancy

  5. P.S. The picture of the Turkish ambassador talking to Danny is wonderful. What made me smile was that the ambassador was in a tux, and whoever was sitting right beside them was in a hoodie. Such diversity!

  6. Dear Elizabeth, you are in my daily thoughts and prayers. Thank you so much for using some of your oh so precious energy to write and update here — I well know how hard it can be to compose coherently when undergoing so many challenging health issues.

    xoxoxo
    Ellie

  7. I’m going to watch the video now but wanted to say that I, too, am glad to see you post. I’ve been watching for updates from you… you continue to be in my prayers. God bless!

  8. Elizabeth,
    You are an amazing woman! It is so nice to hear from you on you blog. I’m looking forward to watching the video in the morning when I get home from work. Continuing to keep you and your wonderful family in our prayers. Love the spiked hair 😉

  9. Elizabeth,
    I’ve missed you, too. So glad to see your post. You looked so beautiful in your navy gown. I will watch the video, but wanted you to know you are thought of and prayed for. Blessings, Stef

  10. Elizabeth,

    I thought you looked beautiful and emailed your Mom right away to tell her the same thing!

    Your speech was wonderful and just exactly right for that occasion. The memory that any of the attendees took away from that night was that your face shone with love for Danny and gratitude for the Allergo Foundation and all they do for children on so many levels.

    Thank you for the wonderful photo of your parents and their beautiful grands.

    Teri

  11. Oh Elizabeth,
    Tell your dad thanks so much for encouraging you to share your speech! You have definitely been thought about, prayed for and “checked on” each day and then I see your post and to hear your speech is just way to inspirational for words!

    Great job (of course!) and I’m with Esther…people do pay money for that style!

    You have no idea what an inspiration and blessing you and your family are.
    Love, hugs and prayers!

  12. Elizabeth, your father was right. Thank you so much for sharing that. And you and I do not know each other, but I have really missed you. You make such a difference. Pax.

  13. Beautiful Elizabeth! Beautiful! I cried happy tears through it! Love it! Thank You Dad for asking Elizabeth to post this link! You have a gift Elizabeth- you touch people’s hearts deeply!
    (((HUGS))) from the Archer gang~

  14. Wow…….what a gifted, heartfelt speech. Thanks for sharing and grateful to your dad for encouraging you to post. I’ve been checking on your blog and praying for you as well. Grateful you were able to post as I so enjoy your blog.

  15. Just watched your speech, Elizabeth. Congratulations and well done. I am sure your story has been a blessing to the foundation in many ways. Tom

  16. Elizabeth–

    you shine with such love.

    you’ve got me searching for movement and education and San Diego for our own boy.

    peace keep you.

  17. Glad to see you posting again. It’s been too long. The video is so touching and tear producing. I cried thru most of it. WTG girl, you wowwed lots of people

    sue

  18. Your speech was so wonderful! Thank you for posting the video. Even though we’ve never met, your goodness and the love with which you embrace your life and your family is so evident in this blog. I’ve been thinking of you and keeping you in my prayers. Best wishes.

  19. hi elizabeth I thought you looked beautiful (something to remember you look at what you have lost we look at who you are and see your beautiful spirit shine) I was expecting you to look bad -from your comments but you look beautiful and lots of women have short spikey hair these days; the video was inspirational as someone with viral brain damage I will be reading their research – I’m always trying to build new pathways in the brain. But the best thing to me was the healing of danny’s heart I know that the other stuff is very important and contributes to the healing but a wounded spirit who can bear am still praying for you and your healing

  20. Can anyone give me the url to Elizabeth’s old blog? (or blogs?) I am wanting to read all the way from the beginning – I think I have so much to learn from you, Elizabeth. (())

    • Hollymama, This is the key blog. It’s tricky to wind your way back to the beginning, but possible. Just keep clicking ‘older’ from a current post and eventually you’ll get back to the start. Esther

  21. I’ve been holding my breath wondering how you have been! Great to read your blog entry today- thankyou. The ball dress looks great, btw, hair looks stylish and trendy- similar length to my friend who is recovering from chemo for breast cancer- we keep telling her she looks like Dame Judy Dench (our famous English actress!) I haven’t looked at the video yet- that will be a treat for a quiet moment. Well done for speaking.
    PS Could you spare a prayer for my Sam please (T21, 11 months old) he had pneumonia after Christmas, he was very poorly and is still coughing alot. I think his little lungs are fed up! I am thanking God for penicillin and inhaled steroids.
    Love and prayers for you all.

  22. Beautifully done, Elizabeth. I have two little ones with autism and I know how much those “small” advancements mean and how much work can lead up to them. I could just picture the whole joyful leg-moving moment!! Danny is blessed to have you as a mama.

    And I continue to pray for you. Thanks for the update…I find it a lot of work to get blog posts done myself and I don’t have nearly the challenges you do. But whether or not you are posting, so many are praying and thinking of you!

  23. Not sure you even have time to read all the comments. I have missed reading your posts. I check this daily and was so happy to see an update yesterday. YOU and the video brought tears to my eyes, I am proud to know you, Danny and your family!

  24. Elizabeth, this is a wonderful video and a sweet testimonial of both Danny and Allegra. I’m praying for your current health, as well.

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