Apologize for what? For being about a month behind in emails. For having boxes of wonderful yarn for the 310 hats project that have yet to make it to the post office. For turning down lunch invitations. For causing my children to miss soccer, or Latin, or altar server training, or OM practice at the last minute. For not posting the absolute most darling photos of George in the snow.
This laziness is so out of character for me… but I guess even as self-critical as I am, I was thinking about it as feeling overwhelmingly weak, not really lazy or tired. So finally I went to the doctor last week, and got diagnosed with adrenal insufficiency. No wonder I was feeling so awful! But they couldn’t/didn’t do anything to make it better until we did some more testing….
Friday morning I went to the hospital at 5:45 for this testing. It turns out that the reason my adrenal glands aren’t working is because my pituitary gland in my brain isn’t telling them to. I know some children who stop working when you don’t tell them what to do, too 🙂 .
Here’s the problem: There is a pretty short list of what can make a pituitary gland quit working in a grownup. Most of that list we know I don’t have – I’ve not had major head trauma recently, I didn’t just suffer massive blood loss in childbirth, etc. The overwhelmingly most common cause of pituitary troubles in adults is tumors. The specialists say that it’s more likely that my breast cancer went to my pituitary than that I have some totally different kind of tumor – although one never knows. My luck is bad enough….. Of course it’s possible that it’s not a tumor at all. When the doctor told me that, I asked her what she thought it could possibly be instead. She couldn’t come up with anything. That’s when I got sort of upset.
I’m still waiting to find out when the radiology studies are going to be. We had to wait until after we did all these other tests because some of the drugs for the new studies would have messed up the earlier tests.
This is now more typing than I’ve done in a week, and it’s time to go rest before George wakes up. Tonight I’m going to my book club meeting, so I have to save some energy. And even though I PROMISED I wouldn’t apologize, I will promise to do my best to get caught back up on life when these medicines start working and I have a little more strength.